Possibly my favorite Omegle chat ever.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hey.
You: Um
Stranger: hey
You: this is gonna sound odd
You: but
You: I've been stalking you
You: I know how to work around Omegle
You: so I contacted you
You: fr srs
You: http://www.facebook.com/profile?=743264506
You: that's you, right?
Stranger: yup sure is
You: So
You: I just wanted to tell you
You: I think I am pregnant
You: uh
You: hard to break this :S
Stranger: o shit... you sure its me
Stranger: ?
You: Yeah.
You: Pretty sure.
You: Because, of, you know, right?
Stranger: o jeez, yes... vaguely though it was such a crazy night
You: Well.
You: Um.
You: You should come to my house tomorrow.
You: Because we need to talk.
You: Hello?
Stranger: ok im free before 2 or after 4 but i have my bands practice ya know... for the big show on thursday and i just can't miss it, sorry if its an inconvience
You: It's fine.
You: Just meet me downtown, like 3ish?
Stranger: ok
Stranger: wait...
Stranger: this is Sarah right?
You: What?
You: Yes.
You: Yeah, that's me.
Stranger: ok thats good then
You: Call me, now, if you can.
You: I have to go.
Stranger: ok i cant phones dead, dogs dead, its all just dead. ill have to meet you tomorrow
You: Okay.
You: 3.
You: Downtown.
Stranger: by the phone booth?
You: Listen, I really have to go, my parent's are getting mad
You: yes
You: there would be fine.
You: Alright, I have to go.
Stranger: ok
Stranger: bye cya tomorrow
You have disconnected.

Omegle Fun Part IV: This one is gross.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi

Stranger: F/m?

You: F.

Stranger: from?

You: I like domination.

You: FROM TEXAS.

You: LONE STAR STATE

You: OVER HERE WE LIKE OUR MEAT RAW AND OUR MEN JUICY

You: NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND.

Stranger: do you a bitch?

You: I is bitch.

You: Bitch.

Stranger: do you like fuck?

You: Uh, mucho.

You: What fuck you like?

You: I like, dick fuck.

You: Dickbutt.

You: Fuck.

Stranger: i like oral

You: hang on i have pic

You: http://tinyurl.com/ltkkdb

You: look

You: that is fuck I like

You: mmmm

Stranger: i have a big dick loh

You: loh yes!

You: i have a big vagina to fit your big dick

You: so big

You: it like CAVE

Stranger: please come to my country

Stranger: in indonesia

You: i would come but i no have plane

You: :(

You: my boob are so SMALL

You: like RAISIN

You: CRINKLY AND SMALL

Stranger: but you have a big vagina?

You: yes

You: very big

Stranger: i want you

Stranger: i want o ride you

You: i want you o ride me

You: ride ur biG DICK all in my BIG VAGINA

You: together we make BIG SEX

Stranger: yes

You: YES!

You: MMMMM

Stranger: do you have facebook?

You: i do

You: http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Carol-Furtado/375351581082?ref=search&sid=1522806016.1782484163..1

Stranger: ooh

You: this me

You: in now

Stranger: oke

You: also look at this pic

You: http://tinyurl.com/ltkkdb

You: picture is SO SEXY

You: it is self picture

You: of me

You: by me

Stranger: yes there is my dick

You: yes! THERE IT IS

Stranger: oh i want to ride you now

You: I WANT YOUR DICK ALL OVER ME

You: ON MY SMALL RAISIN BOOB

You: AND MY BIG CAVE VAGINA

You: YOU CAN CRAWL IN

You: AND NEVER LEAVE

Stranger: yes

You: look at picture!

You: LOOK

You: http://tinyurl.com/ltkkdb

Stranger: AAHHH OHHH

You: AAAAAAHHHHHHH

You: I did final

You: final all over desk

You: mmmmm

You: it is so warm

You: and the baby is beautiful

Stranger: oohh

You: i shall name him STRANGER

You: after you

You: wat is name of you?

Stranger: Ario

You: I SHALL NAME BABY ARIO

You: BABBY IS NOW

You: ARIO

Stranger: ohh'its a good name

You: let's make house together

You: i shall make you tacos

You: every day

You: til you die

You: no more sex near babby

Stranger: are you really?

You: yes.

You: Goodnight, Eric.

You: Goodnight, Ario.

You have disconnected.

Omegle Fun Part III

You’re now talking with a random stranger. Say Hi!

You: Hello, my name is Professor Gary Oak.

You: Welcome to the world of POKEMON!

Stranger: How do you do?

You: Are you a BOY or a GIRL?

Stranger: BOY.

You: What is your name?

Stranger: Harrison.

You: HARRISON, your adventure into the world of POKEMON is about to begin!

Stranger: I'm picking Charmander.

You: Here is my nephew, what was his name...

Stranger: Or can I have Torchic?

You: RIVAL's name?

Stranger: His name is Douche.

You: Oh, that's right, I remember now.

Stranger: Douche Oak.

You: His name is DOUCHE.

You: DOUCHE, HARRISON, I have a special task for the both of you.

You: You can both become POKEMON MASTERS, in the wide world of POKEMON

You: but first you need to pick a starting POKEMON

You: this POKEMON will be with you forever, so choose wisely!

Stranger: I pick Charmander.

You: CHARMANDER: The fire POKEMON.

You: Good choice, HARRISON.

Stranger: I'm naming him Aznable.

You: Wait! Before you go, I have to give you both your POKEDEXES.

You: Oh god, where are the POKEDEXES?

You: FUCK.

You: FUUUUUCK.

Stranger: Don't I have to deliver the parcel first and kick DOUCHE's ass a bunch?

You: I LEFT THEM RIGHT FUCKING HERE

You: GIVE ME A FUCKING SECOND HARRISON

You: GOD FUCKING DAMNIT I'M AN OLD MAN

You have disconnected.

Gotta Catch 'Em All

(for Lit class chapbook)

'Twas a night of sky so dark, the moon hid

Her light did not grace my hand, my friends close

On the chase was I, my eyes glinting keen

My companion's light shining from his tail

Artificial sun in the forest dim.

My quarry ran! My quarry hid! O, chase!

Strike! Strike! You see your target, Brutus! Flames!

Ah! You are weak, come back! Your sanctuary

Is in the palm of my hand, a steel womb.

Release, my comrade of wing and tooth, fly!

Critical hit! It's super effective!

A trap, I throw from my belt, a sphere gold,

To entrap my quarry swift, will it work?

No! He is free, my curses fall to air

Return, battle-weary, and go, other,

He's weak, finish him off-- but keep him waked

The hunt is lost when the prey is downéd.

One more trap, loosed from my gloved pale palm

Gotcha! The prey was caught! And so ends

The long battle, to the box with you.

My quest continues on, 'til all are mine.

[blank verse]

Omegle Part II: Epick Win

Omegle conversation log

2010-02-13

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: hey.

You: I am so tired.

Stranger: hi

Stranger: y?

You: Entertain me.

You: I am tired due to all the sex I had.

You: With my wife.

You: Sharon.

Stranger: um

You: Sharon McGurdy.

You: We live in Minnesota.

Stranger: well

You: Scottsdale Minnesota.

Stranger: how old r u?

You: I am thirty-two.

You: A ripe old age for a ripening Scottsman.

Stranger: omg

Stranger: we r same age as my daddy

Stranger: haha

Stranger: OMG

Stranger: not 2 old

You: No, not too old.

Stranger: ya

Stranger: im only 13 years old

Stranger: i no

You: Are you a female?

Stranger: and im from united sates

Stranger: ya

Stranger: im a f

You: Where in the United States?

Stranger: chicago

Stranger: y u want to no that

You: Mmm, Illinois... land of milk and butter.

You: I have a cousin there, Eric.

You: Eric Junderson.

You: He lives in Dallyvalle, outside of Pinkerton.

Stranger: oh rly?

Stranger: good ..

You: Yeah, we talked by phone just this morn.

Stranger: im just bored

Stranger: i have nothing to do

You: So am I, my nephew told me about this site.

Stranger: my partens are sleeping rite now

You: His name is Jared.

Stranger: oh

Stranger: good

You: He carries the same strong Scottsman blood as I.

Stranger: rite

Stranger: i have a question

Stranger: like..

Stranger: where is ur wife?

You: In her bed, sleeping. Like a good wife.

You: But often my mind strays... to other, more socially unaccpetable thoughts.

You: I assume you are a good christian, correct?

You: A good christian should not think in a sinful way.

Stranger: rite

Stranger: i am not

You: You have not accepted Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior?

You: To guide your sould until the fires of Hell consume the land?

Stranger: well

You: To raise and nurture your four biblical children?

You: Jared, Ishmael, Abraham, and Susan?

You: In Scottsdale, this is the norm.

Stranger: oh

Stranger: im kind of confused

Stranger: rite

Stranger: do u think ur old?

You: I think I am in the prime of my Minnesotan years.

Stranger: oj

Stranger: *ok

You: Soon, I shall raise a farm, on my family's land, after Father passes.

Stranger: umm

You: Then I can teach Jared and Abraham how to ride a horse.

Stranger: can we talk about another this..

Stranger: *thing

Stranger: that's kind of bored

You: Sure, whaT?

Stranger: ummm

Stranger: anything

Stranger: like the fun thing for me

Stranger: think about it

Stranger: like fun thing for a girl like my age

Stranger: 13 years old

Stranger: hello!!

You: ...?

Stranger: r u here?

You: I am here.

You: I do not know to what you are referring.

You: Give me another clue.

Stranger: oops

Stranger: i have 2 go

Stranger: bye!

You: Goodbye, Susan.

You have disconnected.

Fun fun fun Omegle fun

Omegle Conversation Log

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: who wants to see my cock on webcam

You: Me!

Stranger: m or f

You: What's your skype?

You: ffffffff

Stranger: how old are u

You: 14 f Chicago

Stranger: nice

Stranger: do u havmsn

Stranger: do u hav msn

You: I don't

Stranger: ok hold on'

You: wat?

Stranger: k go on mebeam.com

Stranger: and typ in asdf

You: ok

You: ok

You: it not work

You: wait

You: kk i'm on

You: :)

Stranger: u dont hav a webcam

You: SPLIT YOUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUUUUNNNNNDEEERRRR

You: WHEN YOU SEE THE WHITE WHALE

You: BREAK YOUR BACKS AND CRACK YOUR OARS MEN

You: IF YOU WISH TO PREVAIL

You: THE IVORY LEG IS WHAT PROPELS ME

You: HARPOONS THRUST IN THE SKY

You: AIM DIRECTLY FOR HIS CROOKED BROW

You: AND LOOK HIM STRAIGHT IN THE EYE
Stranger: wat

You: WHITE WHALE

You: HOLY GRAIL

Your conversational partner has disconnected.